I have seen some stuff in my time.....

Mom and I loaded up Dad's truck with junk fro their basement and headed up to the dump the other day. We threw in doors, old window frames, a lot of garbage. The pan was full but not for long. We headed up the dirt road instead of taking the highway for fear of losing anything out of the back of her. As we passed the salvage yard we noticed something in the distance on the side of the road. As we got closer we realized it was a pair of boots. We both thought nothing of it but as we got closer we noticed a "body" and I figured a friend of mine had rigged up a "body", thrown it down by the side of the road to frighten the life out of people. Yes, I have friends with a sick sense of humour. But I have it too. So that's where my mind went.
As we passed the "body" Mom and I both noticed hair on it and that's when I thought "oh no it is a real body, not a fake". So I stopped the truck with Mom telling me to keep going and I backed it up to this person. I got out of the truck and as I walked around the corner of the pan I heard Mom yelling "he's breathing, let's go". But I kept going because after what I have been through I am not afraid of anything any more.
As I rounded the truck, a veil was pulled back from the man's face and he looked at me and I said "what the f*@! are you doing on the side of the road?" I have great bedside manner. He replied casually " I was meditating". Meditating?! Meditating? On the side of a dirt road which leads to the dump? What the f@#! was this guy thinking? I knew then he was in need of mental help. I told him I did not think it was a good idea and maybe he should "meditate" up near Stuckless's offices. He said "I will meditate where I want to". I told him to go ahead but it is not very meditative to get run over by an ATV that comes barrelling down over this road. He said "Meditative? What a good word" and he lid back down and covered his face in a white veil.
I got back in the truck and shook my head. I have officially seen it all.