"Military-spouse veterans take care of the sick and injured. More and more service members are returning home wounded. Their injuries are physical and emotional, and no one knows this better than the spouses. The military has a commitment to care for our wounded veterans, but it is the spouse who shoulders most of the responsibility. They are the ones who are waiting in hospital and rehab hallways or relocating their families to be closer to better care. Long after Uncle Sam has done what he can to get these service members back to better health, the spouses will live with the aftermath on a daily basis. They rise to the challenge of new responsibilities as nurse, advocate and counselor."
This article struck an obvious chord with me. I also think the effects of being responsible for all of this should be uncovered, in the open. I am changed. I know he is too, permanently in some ways. We both have changed. It has affected our son, his recent school project includes that time, that date, when everything turned upside down. I was talking with friends, and someone asked (like they have before, I love my friends), "how did you do all that?" I only have one answer "You just do it". With the support of our families and friends, the Forces and the close bonds we made with so many people, they got us through. You got us through. I went back to work to a soft spot to land, a lifesaver actually. I am not sure what I would have done without them, without our friends, without them lifting us up. My in-laws were there for me, and I for them.
Today there are still good days and bad days. Many more good days for sure but the effects from 5 years ago are lasting and new ones crop up. But the positive events bring me back to where I see a future, the laughter, the crying, the anxiety are all a part of my day to day, I have accepted my lot in life. I am married to a true survivor, a fighter, a champion of what the human spirit can achieve in the darkest of times. I have a son who makes us laugh daily, who is intelligent and kind and loves his family and friends. I am not where I thought I would be in life at this age.
I had, in my teens, hoped for a life of success in the medical world, a doc or forensic scientist, not married, no kids, travelling whenever I wanted with an amazing group of friends to share my life with and a man, or two or three.... Funny how I thought that would be a life of success. The meaning of success holds more water now. Married for 19 years, together 22, moved all over Canada and saw most of this country in ways I never imagined, taught thousands of students in the subjects I dearly love, worked with amazing human beings and made hundreds, yes hundreds, of good friends, and had a boy who makes me feel pride and joy daily. That is success, that is happiness. We have families and friends who love us and accept us and I am grateful.
I have heard so many stories over those 22 years, and in the past 5 especially, that it is easy to answer the author's question. Our story is one of many and many stories have made me weep, alone. So I have to end by answering her question "Yes military spouses are veterans too".
http://bangordailynews.com/2013/11/10/living/are-military-spouses-veterans-too/?ref=relatedBox
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