Been a rougher 2 weeks for me. And mainly due to catching a virus that took my voice and my breath away. Jason took care of me and got me to emerg, thank goodness he was thinking. But I think having trouble breathing was so scary that I could not think. It took a while to get better too. Feeling a lot better now.
Before I got sick I had a visit from Sherry which was amazing, too short, but amazing! I wish she was closer to me. Spending time with her grounds me, I feel more of being me. Hard to explain but anyone who has a best friend knows what I am talking about. Plus they know everything about you so you do not have to explain everything all the time.
The smaller things have been bugging me lately and I am not quite sure due to the huge build up of big things and then having to slog through those things and deal with them that I am tired. Tired of fighting, running, advocating, dealing, treading water, ranting and raving. Tired of the BS, the fake, the blade, the unreal. It has caught up to me and I have put plans in place to deal with that and recharge and re-energize myself. Surrounding myself with great friends, talking more (yes I said it) will lead to better days as well.
It is actual work for me to relax and enjoy myself which is an odd thing to put on paper but if you have ever reached max critical stress, again, you know what I am talking about. So I will build it into my schedule and eventually it will become a habit, a good healthy habit for me. You cannot have enough of those in your life.
So tomorrow is a holiday and Jacob and I will spend it with family and friends and enjoy every minute! I salute my country and good habits!
A shout out to families who will not be with their loved ones this weekend. I hope you find a way to enjoy tomorrow, tolerate tomorrow, somehow have a good day tomorrow in some small way.
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