Yesterday Jason walked into the Drive Test Centre and waited patiently 90 mins in a non - first come first served line to be served by a very nice woman who conferred with our point person at the Centre before figuring out how to get Jason his G class license back. Success! Jason was a happy driver again and I turned into a nervous wreck. Why? Well I have been in the "driver's seat" for 11 months now and I kinda liked it. Not the stress, the decisions, the worry. But I like my independence, I like control. Yes I am a control freak to a point. Well I used to be. I tried to control everything until June 23rd last year. Now I jsut try to stay one step ahead of everything and if it all goes to @#%! then I have learned to let it go. Now Jason driving is a wonderful leap in his recovery and a big boost of confidence back in his veins. But I have to let go some more. I am finding that difficult but that's my problem, not his. Of course me giving him orders while he is driving will not work, I tried it yesterday. So how do I get over it? Hopefully time and patience on both our parts will let it happen. When I see him driving I see a man in a bed connected to loads of tubes and machinery driving. I have tried to get that image out of my mind but I just cannot shake it off. At least I have stopped waking up during the night to make sure he's breathing. Yes, I have been that worried and that stressed. That is not good for the both of us either. Relaxing has always been work for me so I will have to work harder. Irony at its finest.
Thank you to everyone who send congrats to Jason and well wishes. He has come a long way and he's worked hard for every bit of it. Your support has helped us make it through it each day. Thank you. XO
No comments:
Post a Comment