ICD kick and moving on

So the past 2 weeks have been a bit of a whirlwind and all has ended well. My girls trip to NYC was amaze-balls (Love the crazy relaity show talk)! Sharing that weekend with Michelle, Jackie and Florence was a dream come true. Mamma Mia was an out of body experience for me, my face hurt from all of the smiling! Of course I banged into 3 women from CBS in the bathroom during the intermission. Of course. Also banged into Dawn Baker in the airport on the way down there, of course.

After all of that elation I spent a day at the Air Force Family Conference in Winnipeg - truly amazing work. It was wonderful to match faces with names and make new connections. CDS and his wife did an outstanding job connecting the dots as did Gen Blondin and his wife. The Wing Commander from Comox left a lasting impression on me. Nice guy, works for his troops and their families, wants to do more - inspiring to say the least. Love my new job, it is challenging and exciting. I am advocating for military families and there is no better job for me.

Then I get home! Jason surprises us all Wednesday evening and we are back into the medical rollercoaster. Thank you Dr. Ruddy for your amazing advice. I cannot thank you enough. Thank you to the Pacemaker clinic and its staff at the Heart Institute, Dr. Lemery and all of the Hear Institute staff - the nurses were so wonderful. Jason is doing well and feeling great. Whew. Still waiting on the letter from MOT about Jason's licence, just another bump in the road.

Talking with one of Jason's night nurses was eye-opening for me. I was talking to her and all of a sudden she looked at me and asked "Are you seeing anyone for that?" By that she meant my worries, my nervousness, my anxieties about all things Jason and his heart. I told her I had and she said "Good. It is time you moved on. You know he may be back her again and again". Hmmmmm. The past almost 3 years have been time spent worrying about another heart attack, about how it will affect Jason and all of us, our lives. 3 years of being frightened, anxiety attacks, crying. Now I spent some of that 3 years laughing, enjoying moments in the moment, feeling warm and fuzzy. It hasn't all been bad. But it was time I moved on. Jason and Jacob did it. Why is it so hard for me? There are worse things happening to good people in the world. I need to be grateful (I am) and move on. Crap happens. So bear with me as I try to reverse old habits. I know I can.

On a happier note,
We went to the twins 3rd birthday party this weekend, we missed one and two so it was so nice to be at their 3rd. A fun time.

May 17th, 2011 in the National Post there is an article about taking out organs for organ donation from patients whose hearts have stopped for 5 mins or more (in ON). The controversy surrounding this fascinates me because 4 years ago I would have thought this was a good thing and now, not so much. It is actually frightening to me that I would have been approached 3 years ago to donate any possible organs due to cardiac death and not brain death. Families need to be accounted for in these policy decisions. Facts do too. I would be interested in hearing how many people survive cardiac death of five minutes or more in Canada. I would also be interested in having it noted in articles posted like the one I mentioned. Showing both sides of astory is important. I am in favour of organ donation, always have been.